My feeling right now..

SNÄLLA HÅLL KÄFTEN! AAAARRGHHHHHH! JAG STÅR INTE UT MED DIG! ÅK TILLBAKA VART ÄN DU NU KOM IFRÅN!

NU!

Thank you!

The rave-party is cancelled and moved one week. Didn't want it to be moved because I actually looked foreward to it.. Guess I have to think about something else to do tomorrow, something fun with "far, far away".. Seriously, can't find a better person in the whole world, she's awesome I tell you! So glad that she's my friend, really (no sarcasm here).

So tomorrow it's friday...

Home, sweet home

I'm home, sitting on my bed, have been fixing with clothes and hair for this friday.. Will be fucking crazyyy~ (probably me and my friend will be the only ones really trying to rave things up, but it's okay, we're pretty awesome).

Now I'll practise german and read a book in english and yes, talk to my boyfriend because he's travelling around Europe and missing me.. Haha, feels nice, because people usually don't miss me (forever alone?).

And now I'll cut things of here soon, because I really have to study now and after that sleep..

P E A C E  O U T !

Cats

Hi there, dear readers.
I love the fact that you still visit my blog even if I'm such a bad blogger (can't do nothing good (cries)). No, seriously, I'm very thankful to you guys (and gals and whatever you are). And more than thankfulness is inside my brain now.. I have SO much to do that has to do with school, also I have a guest and on this friday there will be some partying going on (if they move it I'll probably kill myself..).

Wish I had some fancy pictures to show you, some fancy pictures that would lighten up this blog and make it funnier to read (and/or watch).. I'll check among my files, brb!

Only picture I found that I had the courage to show you.. It's old, halv a year or something..

And yeah, you can always check out my deviantart if you want to, haha, please comment or something, because I would like it ALOT.

http://waruiam.deviantart.com/

A visit to Gotham City

Sorry for the bad update, haha! Have had people here, haha nice time for me I guess. Good friends and beautiful boyfriend in same place, so it was good! Watched some movies (Toy Story 3 (finally!)) and then my guest "far, far away" is also here (she'll probably stay here for about two weeks).

Don't know what to tell you guys.. Yesterday didn't do a shit, ate some fatty stuff and said goodbye to Mr. and today me and "far, far away" was in Gotham City.. Wanted to find a jacket and/or shoes, but instead I came home with the movie "Ninja Assasin" (because of Rain.. hehehe~).

Now I'm rewatching "the Green Hornet" and I will probably watch either "Pans Labyrinth" or "Ninja Assasin" later, because I don't have school tomorrow (fuck yeah sleeeeeeep!).

Well.. talk to you guys another day too! Peace out.

TIme for some isms!

Now I must finish some schoolwork, and later I must make my apartment look nice because of tomorrow, also I must skip training, because there is no time. The thing is I really wanted to train today, to be honest, and now.. I can't because of school.. Now I remember I have to read a book and start writing about it, also I should've bringed some other books home, but i forgot them.
If I survive this evening, I can have a great time tomorrow, but now it actually feels as if I will die here, die because of school. So much and I have planned, there's simply just no time to do anything else but school.

I will stop whining for now and finish some schoolrelated things instead.. Well.. hope you'll have a better (funnier, more awesome) evening than me !

jk, hope you all suffer as much as I do...

CILLA! DET ÄR EN HAJ PÅ BILDEN!

So... I'm waiting for the Queen, because hell yeah she's coming to my place to give me cool stuff and... Who am I kidding? I'm waiting for my mother because I need some color and decoration for my cupcakes (friday you know..)... Right now I feel lonely, I've already did the dishes and cleaned and put all my clothes in the closet.. Nothing more to do than to wait.. WHY ISN'T IT FRIDAY NOW?! This week moves by so slow.

I should finish my essay about different political isms, but I don't want to do that now. Oh, and I should eat because I'm hungry and all I do is to sit on my sofa looking at silly pictures..
Like the one below, with this silly shark (nu behöver du inte bläddra ner mer Cilla, om du inte vill skratta lite åt bilden...).

Pepptalk to myself.

So, (refering to the blogpost beneath) now I'm on my sofa and I should change because I soon have to go to my training. I don't feel like it, because the training is so hard (and yes, because I'm fat and because it rains outside (which means I have to be there with wet clothes (because I want to change home))).

Also I don't want to go training today because I actually have to study (found my mathbook again, and I have to play expert in different political isms and I have to think about events before the Holodomor and I have to practise french...). And I dont want to go training today because I don't want to have bruises again and I don't want to get vesicles on my hands again because of the sticks..

Well, hope this friday will rock, I need to have something to look forward to, and of course I'm looking forward to friday because;
A) Kuusai/Shiro/"far, far away" will come to me in the evening
B) My boyfriend will come over (heart)
C) Fanny and Cilla will help me make a shitload of cupcakes!
D) About ten people will eat those cupcakes and some noodles in my apartment..

Think that I might look something like this while making cupcakes:

Or.. probably I just look like Jack here when finished making them.. And my guest's will probably look like William.. Sorry, can't help that I'm awesome at making cupcakes even if you can't see it >:

School day is finished, now I'm heading home.

My saviour..

..Is named Cilla (link to her blog on the side ->).. She rescued the fly, and now I don't have anything to hate, that's good I guess. Now we'll eat some mudcake, fuck yeah!

And there was... a fly.

There's a fly here.. I hate it, I hate it so much that I can not even express my hate for it.

Today I finally got some real sleep and after waking up my mother helped me color my hair and I colored hers, think the resault was okay, both on me and her. After refreshing our hairs we started packing to get me back to my apartment, cleaned it a little because I've invited some friends to come over on friday. Hope it will be fun, haha promised to cook them some noodles (not make them though, I'm to lazy for that, sorry...).

I promise you guys, I will not be able to sleep because of that fly.. It is SO annoying. Tomorrow it's monday btw, which means school, and I should go to sleep, but I have to talk to peeps first. Sometimes I wish I still lived with my family, because I wouldn't have to come up with silly lies to keep myself safe here (don't misunderstand or something).

Now I will leave you guys with this incredibly boring update. Peace out!

Good evening y'all

Right now I'm in my room doing nothing (as usual). Okay, I do something; I sit and I'm listening to some music, but that isn't much, is it? Nothing worth telling really..

Today I saw the film "Zookeeper", it was fun, but as all american comedies (according to me) it wasn't really my humour, but it was okay, I could rest a little while watching, haha. My cardigan smell SOOOOO good now, at least on the left side.

Nothing more to write actually, and no pictures (as usual (because I always forget to bring my camera (and never have anything to take a photo of...))) so I just leave it like this with some good music..

And yeah, I suck giving my updates name, sorry ):

This day!

Everything went just fine (except nervousity)!

I actually have had a really great day with a gentleman by my side. Seriously, nerver met a more polite guy (in centuries (yes, I'm serveral hundred years old.. lol)) than this one, I'm actually surprised by it.

As the stalker/creep I am, I will meet him again tomorrow and we will watch a film.

Also today both made dumplings and ate them (vegetarian-crime.. sorry world, sorry for my big fail at beeing a vegetarian (haven't even ate gelatine in these last years..)).

Hope you all have had a nice day/evening too!
F R E D

Grattis Pappa!

Today is my fathers birthday! Congratulations to him AND to my mother because it's not only my fathers birhtday it is also their weddingday (now you know!).

I've missed out science-class because I had to go to a meeting with the Student Council... Well.. guess I might learn about orbits and all that stuff by myself (forever alone).

...and now i got slapped by a tie... tough life..........

I will shower now!

Today I've been to school (surprise!) and when I came home I tried to be an expert about different political isms.. It was hard, and I failed (because I don't understand exactly what I'm expected to do..). However, before I go to shower I wanted to update quickly!

Think life is pretty good right now, even if I've been sick lately, now I'm mostly sick of nervousity, because of this friday, seriously.. So annoying to be nervous because of one little thing.. But if all goes well I think I will be even happier after friday, haha. But let us not hope for the best (don't want to get to dissapointed (haha)).

Now I'm of to shower and then to bed, sleep well dear fellows!

F R E D

I'm sick.

Since I've been sick over the weekend (still sick..) I will not participate in the Kali Sikaran training... I would have liked to, but whenever I move it feels as if my brain floating around in my head, it hurts.. Don't even want to imagine how it would feel if moving around as much as you do in Kali Sikaran.

Therefore I will sit in my sofa with a warm blanket over myself and continue reading about the Holodomor (I will write an essay about it for my history class) and hope that my vanilla candle will fill the air with sweet vanilla-scent..

Oh, I can't breathe properly, it's so annoying and someone playes the guitar and sings and I want to do that to, but when I tried I sounded like a gooze, a duck, an ugly bird. NOT. OKAY.

When talking with My!

My feelings..

I'm happy now I think, but at the same time my lack of confidence is visiting me. I really want to be perfect, I want people think I'm beautiful and worth loving. I try to tell myself that I'm okay, I'm not ugly, but it doesn't help me. And if someone says I'm looking good, I laugh, I laugh because I can't take compliments, can't take them for real, because I don't think so myself. I think that sometimes I might look good in pictures, but in real life, in front of the mirror, I can't se anything that is looking good. All I see is a pale face and dry hair, I see I'm not thin enough, my hands are to big, my eyes are not even, my noce is big, my mouth isn't straight, I look bad in my piercings, but even worse* when taking them off..

And no, I'm not begging you to come and give me lies to make me feel better, I just had to write this because I want you guys to understand that right now I'm not feeling that well, I want to beg you for understanding that right now I'm a boring person because of my lack of confidence in myself.

But I can tell you that I'm happy for one thing (even if it makes me feel very unconfident to). I'm kind of looking foreward to this weekend, but I don't look foreward to tomorrow when I have to talk to my mother about this weekend.. haha.. Hope she's okay with it, this is important to me!

Well... now I'll go and talk some more with my lovely friend My (link to her blog on the side ->).

Peace out, F R E D

*happy now Hector?!

I feel life is...

... -PO-TA-TO and I feel like I'm Silas (Da Vinci Code) because of the bruises, and I feel like I'm forever alone.

Bruised.

 I'm not beaten. I can tell you that it hurts when carrying bags.. I wonder why one of them is darkpurple and the other like.. orangebrown-something but both hurt as hell?

Edit; I was just training..

Food dilemma..

That moment when you want to be friend with someone, but you don't dare and you go cook some soup instead.. That moment is my moment in.. one moment (I'll finish updating first).

In a few hours I'll go away for some training.. I'm really tired (don't sleep very well), but I'll do my best, try my best. But I should really eat now, the thing is I'm not hungry at all but I know I will be and I will not come home before nine (training ends nine) and I don't eat after nine. I HATE when it is like this. I must eat, because it's not good to not-eat. So maybe I shouldn't make soup and just make myself some lovely toasts? Should I cook some noodles maybe? OH THIS DILEMMA, I CAN'T HANDLE IT.. Nah, I can, I guess.. Maybe some soymilk will do after all? I can't decide.. and I want to send a friendrequest to someone, but I don't dare, I'm such a chicken..

Well.. I continue thinking about what I should eat for a couple of minutes, and then I probably eat something.. Well.. Hope your okay whereever you are!

F R E D

Just an update..

Today I can announce that uh.. I don't have to shower, there was some serious rain going on outside (walked from school and home, about 15 minutes, I was not dry.. at all when I came home..).

It have been raining here almost every day for about three weeks, I like rain, but not for such a long period of time. You can't look good when your dripping of rain, you simply just can't look good then. So I have been looking ugly every day, now you know!

Well, yesterday I tried Kali Sikaran for the first time in my life, I thought it was hard, but I'll be better after I've tried it some more (hopefully I won't get bruices on my shoulders everytime..).

Nothing more to write for now, and no pictures, I don't have my camera here, and I don't have anything to take pictures of.. But I think that my few readers won't kill me for having this incredibly boring blog.

F R E D

Dum Spiro Spero - Toshiya

I wanted to show you this drawing I did early this morning. Hope you like it and if you do; why not follow me on deviantart? (winkwinkblinkblink)

http://waruiam.deviantart.com/

4evah arone...

I'm sitting here alone again, but I kind of like it.. My mother left half an hour ago, after we ate some fatty pizza (I like the combo of banans and olives on my pizza.. don't know why...). The pizza was good, but fat, and uhm.. cheesy, and I don't eat cheese, but well.. whatever, as long as it isn't meat?

While shopping food for this week I bought soy-milk, becasue;
A) I don't like milk (from cows)
B) I need calcium and B12
C) I've heard that soy-milk doesn't taste like cow-milk and therefore I thought it was worth trying.

Sooo.. What else have I done? This weekend I've slept away, while I should've done math and other school-related things, but it is not easy to do that when your sleeping.. So, I took care of it earlier today and I'll finish it off later this evening.

Take care, peace out... F R E D

Hips don't lie..

...That's what I've been told. Haha, but yeah.


Hope his hips doesn't lie, I can't get this song out of my mind, can't get that dance out of my mind. It's annoying by now (had it since like.. early yesterday..). Why is southkorean music so catchy? But well, I like it I think.

See you, now I'll continue to have Hip Song stuck in my head while doing nothing when I should do some schoolwork..

F R E D

What if...?

I'll just... leave this here.

I'm nice.

Hello there!

So, I ain't got much to tell you, but I felt that I had to write here.. Wish I was more like Cilla, because she remember all the fun shit that happens in a day. I, myself, forget them and can't write about them. Sorry for that.
Probably I should do some math and history (and like 5000000 other school-related things) but instead I'll be waiting for a friend so that we can go to 'le centrum' together, will talk to some trainer there, because something was wrong with a site and blablabla... Lovely when nothing can go smooth.

Have you guys noticed that I don't write in swedish anymore? I'm a nice person, so I was thinking about the readers that isn't from Sweden. I surprise myself for beeing so nice to you all!

Now this blogpost will be over soon.
F R E D